“A Balancing Act”

I have arrived at a point where I have learned the need to unlearn. Unlearning Western tropes of what it means to be; i. to be beautiful, ii. to be a woman and iii. to be an artist. Western pop culture and the tropes that come with it have infiltrated into my subconscious my whole life, irrespective of the fact that I only ever lived in the Middle East and Asia, before moving to America 3 years ago. It put me at constant war with myself, mentally and physically, to uproot anything and everything to conform. My identity is entrenched by Western definitions of beauty, womanhood, and what it means to be an artist. There is a thin veil between these 3 narratives, yet they are distinct. 

My current body of work focuses specifically on perspectives surrounding body hair, or lack thereof. I observe the minutiae of my habits and thought patterns that are learned, and make drawings and paintings in an attempt to unlearn.

This work fits aptly under the title- A Balancing Act.  It speaks to the curious dichotomy that exists between the hair on my body that I nurture, nourish, and comb, versus those I pluck, thread and wax. So deeply ingrained is the duality that I don’t even stop to question these conflicting actions. One of tenderness the other of eradication, of the same hair growing on the same body. It feels surgical, the treatment of the hair that I uproot. Unlearning hasn’t meant a reversal of action. Instead, the gaze with which I examine my hair has softened, even towards the hairs I consider deplorable that grow on my legs or upper lip.

I haven’t stopped these acts as a form of protest. Instead, I present a matter-of-fact narrative that reflects these daily actions in an attempt to unveil these acts otherwise muffled into secrecy. 

It is only through the act of creating, not merely looking at someone else's creation, that I can truly unlearn. 

And there is so much unlearning to be done.